“I have developed several emotional issues like lack of self confidence, self-esteem, concentration problem, anxiety and being a perpetual worrier on trivia”.

Although his case may seem uncommon to those of us who have lived in comparatively safer and freer countries, you might be interested in reading about the common causes of our mental, emotional and psychological unrest in my response to him:

“A blessed New Year to you Z!  And thank you for your inquiry.

Moving from one country/culture to another even when the two countries/cultures are similar is quite an upheaval – pulling up one’s ‘roots’ and establishing new ‘roots’.

When the two countries/cultures are so different, that upheaval has an added dimension of adjustment.  In your case, this adjustment may have much to do with trust.

I say this because it seems that you have grown up and lived in a culture that you now see as oppressive and one that you appear to be unable to trust.  Perhaps you have always felt the culture, religion and government of your country of birth to be oppressive and untrustworthy.

Whichever it is, the fact is you don’t feel you are able to live your life as fully and freely as you would like to, personally and professionally.

The first thing I’d like to say, Z, is that there are many, many people who are not living their lives as fully and as freely as they would like to.  They can be found in all parts of the world.

The clinics and offices of professional therapists, psychologists, counsellors and other related professionals in the West (and to a slightly lesser degree in the East) are well patronized by such people.

My point here is simply this:

While our backgrounds may be different, our experiences unique and the triggers for our psychological and mental disquiet many and varied, the underlying cause of our mental/emotional/psychological pain is the same – it is fear.

Fear takes many forms, one of which is distrust.  We are unable to trust the world to be kind to us, to do right by us and to allow us to live fully and freely.

At the same time, we have lost confidence in ourselves and we are unable to trust ourselves to know what is best for us, to make the decisions that we need to make and to follow our dreams.  In short, to live fully and freely!

Let me say it again – most of us are in the same boat.  We differ only in degree!

So, what can I recommend in a situation such as yours?

I shall put it in dot points.  I suggest that you use each one as a point of reflection and meditation.

Begin by sitting in a quiet and comfortable place.  Allow yourself to relax by holding a sense of softness in your mind.  Take some deep and gentle breaths.  Then instruct your mind in the following way:

I allow myself to be soft, open and spacious.

I allow myself to sit in the direct flow of universal energy, source, unconditional love, god, Allah (use the term that you are most comfortable with).

I allow myself to feel the peace, power, joy and freedom of this universal energy.

Take a few more deep breaths.

Now, reflect on one or more of the following.  Take your time with each:

I am an expression of god/love/universal energy

As an expression of god/love/universal energy, no one and no thing has power over me

The only thing that is vulnerable is my fear-conditioned mind

My natural mind is powerful, peaceful, joyous, limitless and free

No one and no thing is responsible for my happiness or unhappiness, my sense of power or powerlessness, no more than I am responsible for anyone else’s

When I cease to hold someone or something else responsible for who and what I am, I assume full responsibility for, and power over, myself.  I am liberated.

As an expression of ultimate source/universal energy, I am free to be, do and have anything I want.  I am only limited by my fear-conditioned mind

My purpose in life is joy.  It is something I can choose right now and focus on right now

When I focus on joy, on living fully and freely, I feel empowered for I have dropped all disempowering thoughts and feelings

May I also suggest the following articles that you will find at my blog:

Being happy means being powerful  http://www.lucylopez.net/planethappiness/?p=654
Whatever you believe, you are right    http://www.lucylopez.net/planethappiness/?p=246
A beautiful meditation for the happiness of all    http://www.lucylopez.net/planethappiness/?p=398
How do you handle barriers to your happiness     http://www.lucylopez.net/planethappiness/?p=678

I hope you find them useful.

Have faith Z.  Trust in the true nature of who you are – powerful, limitless and free.  Experience it in meditation.  Be joyous in your intentions!”

Love always,

Lucy

Awakening to Happiness, Prosperity and Freedom!

PS  Keep an eye out for my free new ebook, 10 Power and Prosperity Themes for the New Year, that you’ll be able to download from this blog!

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Jealousy is one of the most destructive mind states leading us to behave in deplorable ways – from launching verbal swipes/put downs at others to some of the most elaborate and heinous crimes of murder.

Put simply, jealousy is that mind state of thoughts and feelings that is rooted in a belief – that someone else has or is something that I want but which I believe I cannot have or be.

Because we see someone else have what we want and what we believe we cannot have, we direct our resentment towards that person.  Yet, when we examine it closely, we find that our jealousy has far more to do with our belief that we cannot have what we want than it is to do with someone else having what we want.

This is an important distinction to make because it allows us to see that the source and cause of our jealousy is not someone else and what they have but our very own mind and its beliefs about our power and freedom.

If we believed that we could have anything that we want and we felt free enough to go after what we want, we would never feel jealous about anyone.

When we believe that we cannot have or do something, we effectively put blocks in the natural flow of our free, limitless energy.

When we believe that someone else, by virtue of what they do or who and how they are, is a threat to our inner happiness, we put blocks in the natural flow of our free, limitless energy.

All this causes us to feel powerless and it is the feeling of powerlessness that causes us to take jibes at others, behave in childish and petulant ways and, in more extreme cases, take more extreme and destructive action.

In the relationship we have with our partners, jealousy, which ultimately results in the feeling of powerlessness, blocks the flow of love and gets in the way of our inner happiness.

You cannot feel happy and powerless at the same time – they are two very different vibrational states.

Are you interested in finding out how you can overcome jealousy in your relationship and have the relationship you truly desire?  Are you serious about taking charge of yourself so that you can be the kind of partner you wish to attract?

You’ll find guidance on these and other relationship issues that trouble most partners in my free ebook, Relationships – Burning Questions, Illuminating Answers – The Inspired Guide to having the relationship you truly desire.  You can download it here.

“I have read a number of lengthy books on this subject and none have inspired me to ‘change’ as much as Lucy’s book.” Alison McCartney, Social Worker, Wife, Mother

Love always

Lucy

Awakening to Happiness, Prosperity and Freedom!

How can you be a truly inspiring parent?

How to help your child stay healthy and happy

Why should you let yourself age?

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Take, for example, a job I had to get done.  Now, I knew that it involved writing 28 pages in a day.  Right, that seemed pretty straightforward enough so I dutifully sat down and began typing.

Sometimes, the ideas would flow steadily with perhaps a brief pause here and there as my brain scanned its databases for the most appropriate word to use.  At other times, the ideas were a little less willing to stream through and those were the times when I would take a break and try and do something different.

When I got back, I would continue with a little more momentum than when I’d stopped but it wouldn’t be long before I was stalled yet again for an idea.

If you’re a writer, you’ll be very familiar with this sort of thing and more than likely take it philosophically as ‘par for the course’.

However, it occurred to me one day that, given that I’ve been writing for most of my life and that I’ve been writing ‘professionally’ for a good few years, shouldn’t this get easier?  Shouldn’t I be able to stick at something just a little bit longer and coax the writing muse to stay longer than it usually does?

Don’t get me wrong.  Breaks are wonderful and necessary.  But they don’t always create or cause greater efficiency.  What do I mean by that?

If I needed to write a 28 page document in one day, I should have been able to do it, given my experience, my knowledge, my skills etc.  After all, I’d done it before and I should be able to do it again whenever I wish to.  But why wasn’t it getting any easier?  Why didn’t I feel I was getting ‘better’ at it?

Pondering these questions triggered the ‘ah-ha’ moment.  I realized that what I hadn’t done but ought to have done was set myself mini-goals, or sub-goals, if you like.

For instance, I could have broken down the 28 pages per day into say, 7 pages per hour.  That would have enabled me to complete the job in 4 hours.  Or, I could have set myself a less demanding pace and decided to complete the job in 7 hours, which would have meant 4 pages per hour.

Within these time frames, I could easily allow for breaks thus keeping a fresh and steady momentum.

So what is the ‘elusive obvious’ here?

It’s this:

The brain is most efficient when it has more immediate, measurable and frequently occurring targets.

Blindingly obvious, you say?  I agree, ‘cept we don’t always remember, do we?  And we don’t always apply it to all our goals, do we?

28 pages a day is a good enough target when you have 28 such chunks to complete in the next 28 days.  The brain then organizes itself according to the 28 days and the subconscious ‘pressure’ to complete 28 pages each day is active and effective.

However, when the 28 pages in one day is a one-off, non-recurring event, then the brain requires more immediate, measurable and frequently occurring targets or goals.  The ‘pressure’ is set off at each hour and you’re more likely to stick to the demands of each hour i.e. 4 (or 7) pages rather than hang loose by a less immediate and less frequent demand such as ‘a day’.  After all, when does the ‘day’ start for you?  When does it end?  A day is an adjustable target, an hour isn’t!

Does this make sense?  I hope so.  If not, consider this:  Which of the following requests is likely to get you acting more efficiently i.e. producing the most suitable response in the least amount of time :

• Please be ready for dinner this evening
• Please be ready for dinner in the next 30 minutes?

Or, how about this one.  Which of these is going to get you moving real fast:

• Walk fast because there might be snakes in the area
• Walk fast because there’s a snake right behind you?

Yes, your brain’s efficiency increases when the targets are immediate, measurable and frequently occurring :).

But now, here’s the more important reason for sharing all this with you:

When it comes to ‘personal development’ goals, these too operate by the same principles.  You would be more successful with them if they too were broken down to more ‘immediate, measurable and frequently occurring’ goals!

Yes, the goals of happiness and freedom and prosperity can and should be broken down into sub-goals with more immediate, measurable and frequently occurring time frames.

Now, if you’ve read this far and are keen to know what I mean by that and what examples I might offer you, I dare say you’re going to be disappointed, if not irked, by what I’m about to suggest.

Why?  Because I’m sure you’ve heard it before and perhaps chosen to ignore it or didn’t think you could do it or even tried and didn’t succeed or perhaps simply had no idea how to do it.

Well, despite the risk of leaving you disappointed and/or irked, here is what I suggest when it comes to the goals of happiness, freedom and prosperity:

Break them down to the immediate and frequently (constantly) occurring goal of…

NOW.

Indeed, it’s the only way you’ll ever ‘achieve’ them!  Imagine, intend and allow happiness, prosperity and freedom NOW.  It’s not just a metaphysical goal, it’s a proven method for getting your brain to cooperate with you in achieving your goals.

If you have any doubt about the effectiveness of this, just remember:

What you see in your immediate reality are the EFFECTS of PAST thoughts, imaginations, intentions and permissions.

If you wish to see different things i.e. EFFECTS in your future reality, set yourself the immediate goal of imagining, intending and allowing them NOW.

Do it.  NOW.

Love always

Lucy

Awakening to Happiness, Prosperity and Freedom NOW!

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Ready for some no-nonsense, right between the eyes, wrist-slapping self-examination?

Well, ready or not, here it comes:

If you believed that your happiness was not in the least bit affected by

what others say or do,

the choices they make,

the catastrophes they somehow ordain,

the beyond-belief atrocities they execute,

the unpardonable shame they rain upon themselves and others,

the irreparable damage they cause to themselves or others or to the planet,

the ignominious way they treat others…

yes, I could go on but you get the point…

well, would you be happy?

If you answered ‘Yes’, I have only one thing to say to you:

Welcome to the kingdom of god, to the place of eternal truth, to the source of un-caused happiness!


If you answered ‘No’, I have only one suggestion to make:

Answer the question again and this time choose a different answer.

Love always!

Lucy

Awakening to Happiness, Prosperity and Freedom!

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Dear Friends

If you have been reading my blog posts and my personal development information material, you’ll know that I am an advocate for ‘Happiness, Abundance and Freedom through Self-Awareness’.  In fact, all my work, whether with myself or with my clients, is grounded in self-awareness.  Put it this way:  My life is about self-awareness!

The more aware I am of who I truly am, the more happiness, power, abundance, freedom, energy and wellness I experience!  Why?  Because all of these are who (or what) I truly am!

Fear, anxiety, poor health, lack, guilt, poverty, powerlessness and so on are who or what I am not!

Now, if you happen to be a believer of the Law of Attraction (which I prefer calling the Law of Creation) AND are consciously and successfully using it to attract/create the things you desire, then I am certain that you too appreciate the need for self-awareness.  If so, perhaps there is little here that you don’t already know and are not already consciously practising.

However, if you are a believer of the Law of Attraction/Creation, (or at least want to be) but are not experiencing any or much success, then keep reading.

If you have read or listened to any of the most influential teachers/mentors/guides of the Law of Attraction, you may notice that self-awareness is integral to their message.

In fact, it is by becoming aware of who you are, how you ‘work’, how consciousness ‘works’, if you like, that you become more skilled at using the Law of Attraction/Creation to create what you desire.

Becoming aware of who you are and how you ‘work’ is tantamount to finding the happiness, abundance and freedom that you desire.  And it involves recognizing who or what you are not which, in turn, involves becoming aware of your beliefs, attitudes and responses to people and things.

You see, it is impossible to attract/create what you want if your efforts are tainted with opposing beliefs, attitudes or behaviors, many, if not most, of which you aren’t aware of!

The certain outcome of such efforts is attracting/creating things that you don’t want such as unhappy relationships, financial stress, addictive behaviors, fearful situations, ill health and so on.

It’s not that these things are neatly packaged ‘disaster parcels’ delivered to you by some evil force with a personal vendetta against you.  Rather, they are what you create through your lack of self-awareness!

In short, become more self-aware and you create more of what you want!

Create consciously!

Lucy

Awakening to Happiness, Abundance and Freedom!

PS  Want personal help with expanding your self-awareness and become a creator of what you want?  Read this.

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Image from Think Quest

Have you ever shied away from seeking financial independence?  If so, I’m sure you’ll take consolation from that fact that you’re not alone in thinking and feeling this way.  Too many people have felt this way (myself included) and still do (myself excluded :-)).

In so many ways and through so many different people, we’ve consciously or unconsciously inherited the belief that seeking financial independence (often confused with accumulating wealth) is antithetical to the spiritually (often confused with religiously) directed life.  This unfortunate inheritance, rooted in mistaken understandings and beliefs, is the cause of a great deal of conflict, guilt and failure to secure financial independence.  But rather than being antithetical to spiritual growth, financial independence actually enables us to growth and thrive spiritually.

Before I continue, I should explain what I mean by spiritual growth and a spiritually-directed life.  Put simply, spiritual growth is the awakening to and living from the truth of who we are and a spiritually-directed life is one whose priority is  spiritual growth.  And just to make sure there are no other ambiguities here, let me also explain what I mean by financial independence.

Financial independence is being free of all the pressures, fears and limitations that impact on us when we lack the essential things that money can provide us with.  Financial independence does not bring us happiness.  Rather, it removes the barriers that prevent us from experiencing and living from our natural state of happiness.  In other words, financial independence allows us to live from our true nature!

It is important to understand that financial independence does not equate to the amassing of wealth for the need to do this is reflective of a mind that in entrenched in the falsehood of lack.  Financial independence is about the freedom from the pressures, fears and limitations that are associated with lack.  In this sense, it is possible that a person who does not experience lack despite having a very ‘modest’ income is financially independent!  In the same way, a person who has amassed a fortune but remains fearful of losing it is not financially independent!

Herein lies the spiritual truth of financial independence.  By removing or seeing through the barriers of fear, pressure, worry and limitation, financial independence enables us to experience our true nature which is in fact, abundant, limitless, powerful, joyful and free!

So long as you do not confuse financial independence with the amassing of wealth or an ironclad guarantee that you will never run out of money, but instead understand that it removes barriers to the realization of our true nature, there is absolutely no need to shy away from it!  On the contrary, it is important to recognize that financial independence is a necessary (though not sufficient) condition for spiritual growth and the experience of  happiness.

Lucy Lopez

Awakening to Happiness!

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