Perhaps the following may help:

You are a DOORWAY if you

• Listen fully and freely to your own thoughts and feelings without trying to escape them, deny them, change them or bury them under some new distraction, decision or action
• Listen to someone else’s thoughts, feelings and ideas without judging them, refuting them, trying to change them or override them with your own
• Explore new ideas and alternative and opposing beliefs with a sincere heart and mind
• Feel and express delight, gratitude, encouragement, understanding and acceptance towards yourself and others, even when you may not agree with them
• Recognize that each moment is a moment filled with potentiality for new creations and for charting new directions
• Are willing to learn and try new things instead of insisting that you already know it all or already have the best or that some things are impossible
• Allow the natural energy of love to be expressed through you without preconditions or expectations of reciprocation or the fulfilment of your wishes/desires
• Are free from absolute concepts of ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ and ‘good’ and ‘bad’
• Recognize that you will never be ‘done’ and that you will never ‘get there’ because your awareness is infinite
• Maintain your naturally peaceful, joyous, limitless and free mind
• Recognize your natural abundance and infinite potential
• Recognize that natural living is effortless living

You are a FENCE if you

• Are preoccupied with winning, impressing, challenging, fighting or demanding
• Listen for the sake of maintaining or proving your own point or position, while seeking to overturn or disprove someone else’s
• Make decisions and take actions based on fear and all its offspring including doubt, worry, guilt, anxiety, impatience, jealousy, envy and insecurity
• Believe that you cannot have/create new ideas, beliefs and personality traits as well as new relationships with people you are already in relationship with
• Believe in lack, blame, vengeance or retribution/payback which is often called ‘justice’
• Seek to justify your decisions, actions, thoughts and feelings either to yourself or to others
• Do things for others with some expectation of reciprocation, no matter how small or reasonable it may seem to you
• Think and express through word and action, the thought/belief: “I love you because…”
• Hold back on feeling and expressing gratitude, delight, confidence, kindness, encouragement, admiration, creativity and inter-dependence
• Insist on manipulating the material world and the people in it (which is about manipulating the effects of non-physical causes i.e. your thoughts) in order to bring about change when, in fact, there is really no ‘change’ but only ‘new creations’ arising from new ways of thinking, imagining, visioning, intending and allowing
• Clutter your mind with worry, fear, anxiety and other troubling thoughts and feelings, thereby blocking the natural flow of goodness and greatness
• Believe that suffering is a necessary precondition for happiness

In short, a doorway allows your natural great peace, joy, abundance, limitlessness, power and freedom to flow freely and fully while a fence blocks their free flow!

Go on, be a doorway, starting right now!

Love always,

Lucy Lopez

Awakening to Happiness, Power, Prosperity and Freedom!

Australian Readers, are you in or close to Eumundi?  Want to contribute to Harmony for Haiti fundraising event by participating in workshops Sunday, 14th March?  I will be running one – see the flyer below.  For more details (available from Friday), go here http://www.bellbunya.org.au/calendar

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One of the important clues we have to answering this question is to take stock of how we feel at the time we find ourselves wondering about the purpose of our lives.

Almost always, there are feelings of dissatisfaction with the way things are and have been for some time.

There might also be feelings of anxiety, particularly for those of us who have reached or are approaching ‘middle age’, spurred on by the belief that we’re running out of time.

And there might be a feeling of surrender – OK, I’ve been ignoring this restlessness, this emptiness, this feeling that something’s missing for too long.  Let me just pay attention to it now!

We’ve done the things that we thought we wanted to do or had to do as younger adults – got married, had children, raised them, pursued our carriers, paid off the mortgage and…now what?

Why isn’t all of that enough?  After all, none of it was plain sailing.  There were heartaches and crises, despair and disappointment.  Surely, I should be ready to just relax from here on, now that the tide is out and learn to just enjoy life?

So why am I still nagged by this unanswered question: What is the purpose of my life?

If your child asked you the same question,’What is the purpose of my life?, what would you say?

I’d like to be able to tell you that there is one, complete, irrefutable answer to this question but I would be trying to fool you if I did.

What I do have, though, is an answer that has emerged through all my life experiences, reflections and study.  The answer is simply this:

To enjoy the adventure of life!

To date, I have not found a better, more compelling answer.

Now, I suspect that this may not be enough for you because what you really want to know are the specifics.  What you’d really like is a fortune-teller kind of answer:

“I see you writing best-selling novels and going on global tours to speak to hungry audiences who lap up with relish every single word that you utter”.

Or perhaps,

“You are really an incarnation of a warrior queen from over 10,000 years ago in a land then known as Axumbe. You are here to satisfy her yearning to provide for all her people.  I see you working in a refuge camp somewhere in Africa…”

Or how about this:

“You’re here to enlighten people, to help them awaken through your healing power. Have you ever felt a desire to become a spiritual healer?”

Yep, that would be handy, wouldn’t it?  You’re given the directions to your life, now all you have to do is follow them.

I am being facetious, of course.  But for a reason.

In the Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, we read that the answer to life is 42.  Mmm…nonsensical, you might think, at least until you realize that the author is trying to make a point, i.e.

What is your question?

Is it, What is the meaning of life? Or, What is the meaning of my life? Or, What is the purpose of my life?

Well, who would be best to answer these questions?  Some super-computer/god?  Or you?  And, if so, how would you go about answering them?

In fact, would this not be a more useful question for us to ask:

How do I go about determining the purpose of my life?

Through a process of sincere and free enquiry, of course.  Self-enquiry, which might involve questions such as:

What do I want from life?

What do I wish to offer?

What allows me to experience greatest joy?

Ask these questions without restricting yourself in any way, without accepting as ‘given’ your present circumstances, the world as it is.

The luminaries of this world, past and present did not allow themselves and their vision and mission to be limited by what they saw and what they were experiencing.  Instead, they allowed themselves the freedom of imagination, to go beyond what is….

“I have a dream…”

So, put that wondrous ability that you possess, the ability to imagine, to dream, to use.  Let it work multi-dimensionally to fashion and guide you in the ‘how’ of your vision as it breaks through conditioned thinking and reaches into the magical field of infinite possibilities.

Your part is to allow yourself the freedom to imagine, to dream, to ask and answer sincerely and to remain open to the nudges and prompts that the creative force of love uses to communicate with you.

Sure, you might have an epiphany of dramatic proportions but love speaks in many, many other ways :).

Neither should you expect the answer to arrive in the form of a readily recognizable career path or profession.  The creative force of love has infinite ways of giving shape and form to your life purpose.  So, stay open and alert!

Love always

Lucy Lopez

Awakening to Happiness, Freedom and Prosperity!

PS

Australian Readers, are you in or close to Eumundi?  Want to contribute to Harmony for Haiti fundraising event by participating in workshops Sunday, 14th March?  I will be running one – see the flyer below.  For more details (available from Friday), go here http://www.bellbunya.org.au/calendar

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“There is no way to prosperity.  Prosperity is the way” Wayne Dyer

“The greatest single source of wealth is between your ears” Brian Tracy

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The kids,  mostly 12-13 year olds, were eager to try out what they’d just learned – a new sequence of moves in attack and defense.  They were especially keen as today, they had the attention of their instructor, the head Sensei, (teacher) who had just demonstrated the moves.

At 63, he was nothing short of a paragon of fitness, fine craft, a rich stockpile of humor to match the range of age groups his students spanned, and, as I was to observe yet again, a source of wisdom.

Having had about 5 minutes of practice, the boys were called to attention.  Sensei made some general comments and then asked a pair to demonstrate the moves for the others to observe and critique.

When they’d completed their demonstration, Sensei asked for feedback.   A couple of the boys offered something which Sensei repeated to the group and used to further explain the martial art.  He thanked them.

One young lad then said something which I did not hear, sitting as I was, outside the training area in a section designated for parents who wanted to watch their kids train.  The child’s comment, however, brought on a round of  laughter but it was quickly muted by Sensei’s grave tone.

“Don’t try to make yourself bigger by making someone else smaller”

I was struck by this unexpected wisdom.  ‘Unexpected’ because I had different expectations of the benefits of karate lessons from Sensei. I knew he was good at his craft and well-respected for it but this incident provided me with yet another reason why he had gained an enviable reputation.

I suppose you could say that Sensei was a master of not only the physical and technical skills of his martial art but also its spiritual and psychological wisdom.

“Don’t try to make yourself bigger by making someone else smaller”

It’s a lesson I have frequently reminded my son of.  You see, he was among those kids fortunate enough to experience Sensei’s wisdom.

It’s something that I have often reminded myself of and shared with my clients.

How many times have you ‘made yourself bigger by making someone else smaller’?  If not overtly with teasing, sarcasm, cynicism or condemnation, covertly through the commentary running silently and ceaselessly in your head?

How many times do you judge?  In a day?  In an hour?  How often do you claim, consciously or otherwise, superiority, whether of intellect, professional ability or personal virtue?

“I would never do what he did”

“She is such a hypocrite”

“He thinks he is so smart”

“What right has she got to say that?”

“He has no idea…”

Every time  you  think such thoughts, you are claiming your superiority over another.  Their error, shortcoming or vice is your pedestal of superiority, of ‘better than’.  If it were not, you would not have such thoughts!

More importantly, if you had no need for that false sense of superiority, you would not entertain such thoughts, such judgments.  And yes, it is false.

It happens mostly unconsciously.  It happens largely because we have learned to see others in this way, through the distorting lens of judgment. I assure you, it is not natural.  Common, yes.  ‘Normal’, yes.  But ‘natural’, most assuredly not.

Can we change?  Can we learn to see others differently?  Oh yes.  Absolutely, yes!  It’s about  ‘seeing things as they truly are‘ – a marvelous Buddhist injunction.

Seeing without judgment or blame.  Sticking to facts by replacing thoughts such as

‘He is arrogant’ with ‘He said/did..xyz’  or

‘I would never do what she did’ with ‘Only she knows what she did and the circumstances surrounding her action. My decision not do something like that is best based on how I feel and what my motivation is, not on what she or anyone else has done or not done’

Stick with the facts.  Leave the judgments out.  Observe others behaviors not for the purpose of claiming superiority but to explore yourself, your motivations, your defenses, your biases.

The happy mind is the mind that is free from judgment.  Choose a happy mind.

Blessings,
Lucy Lopez

Awakening to Happiness!

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I had a pretty remarkable realization yesterday.  I was out with my nephew who has been holidaying with me.  We were in a part of the Gold Coast hinterland viewing a tunnel of historic interest built in 1885.  It was a rather short tunnel, about 30 meters.

So, there I stood, a short distance in front of the entrance of the tunnel as my nephew started walking ahead.  I was struck by the stark contrast between the darkness inside the tunnel and the brilliant afternoon sunlight at either ends of it.

Despite the contrast, however, I was able to see the tall, uneven, yellowy-brown sides of the tunnel and the darker dirt ground.  But it was only as I began walking through the tunnel myself that the impact of this contrast hit me.

As I approached the middle of the tunnel, wondering aloud to my nephew how cave men and women must have lived in similar cavities like this hundreds of thousands of years ago, I was stopped abruptly in my tracks.

I couldn’t see anything around me as the darkness was thick and full.  I immediately began to feel fearful.  This despite the two bright sun-drenched entrances to this short tunnel that were in full view to me!

I was overcome with amazement and incredulity.  Here I was, in the middle of this very short tunnel feeling afraid of the darkness when, only seconds ago, I had been at the entrance able to see the inside of the tunnel, a view which gave me absolutely no reason to fear being inside it!

For a few seconds, I remained motionless, afraid to put a foot forward… in case…Fortunately, I became quickly aware of the absurdity of my fear.  For goodness sake, I thought, I only need to look up and focus on the….

light at the end of the tunnel

to give me the direction I need to keep walking!

You cannot imagine my astonishment and the awe I felt upon this most direct, palpable realization of a truth that had thus far remained largely metaphorical in my mind…

I can tell you that there have been many, many moments or periods in my life when I have felt rooted to the ground with fear, sadness and desolation.  At those times, I have forgotten to simply look up and focus on the light, focusing instead on the very fear, sadness and desolation that was preventing me from moving forward!

Increasingly, however, through meditation/mindfulness i.e. by maintaining an awareness of what my mind is doing, I am able to much more rapidly recognize when I have lost sight of the light at the end of the tunnel and therefore, quickly continue to move in the direction of what I desire, which is to be happy!

Admittedly, over the years, my tendency to lose sight of the light at the end of the tunnel has been largely replaced by my desire to focus on being happy!

So, how about you?  Do you find yourself losing sight of the light at the end of the tunnel?  How do you recover from such ‘blindness’ and how long does it take you?

Blessings!

Lucy Lopez

Awakening to Happiness!

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As people get into the habit of observing their breath during meditation practice, it is easy for them to lose sight of the purpose of breath awareness.  In fact, it is easy to fall into the trap of thinking that observing the breath is the purpose of meditation!  It is not.  It is merely a means to an end…

As I’ve explained in my previous posts on meditation, the practice of meditation has many and far-reaching benefits.  Ultimately, however, its purpose is to help us achieve greater states of happiness and peace, something that we all want.

So why is breath observation given so much attention and importance?  Let’s look at some of the reasons:

• It gives us a readily available point of focus.  No matter where you are or what you are doing, you can always tune into your breath
• No other materials or preparation are required for us to practice observing our breath
• It provides us with a readily available object of focus that traverses the entire landscape of gross to subtle phenomena.  For instance, when you first begin, you may focus on the in-breath and the out-breath.  Then you might extend your observation to notice through which nostril the breath enters and through which it leaves.  Next, you might notice the speed of entry and exist of air and the force of entry and exit.  As you continue, you will begin to notice even more subtle qualities of the breath by observing the length of the in-breath and that of the out-breath and the ‘gap’ or pause between each out-breath and the next in-breath.  You may also notice the sensations you experience at the rims of your nostrils as air enters and leaves.  In this way, the breath provides you with a range of observable qualities, from ‘gross’ to ’subtle’ .

So how is all this beneficial?

Well, for one thing, the sharper and finer your observation, the clearer and brighter is the quality of mindspace that you occupy as more and more of your conditioned thoughts, feelings and other preoccupations  ’settle’ like mud in a glass of muddy water.

This quality of mind approximates the quality of your natural, unconditioned mind of unsurpassable power, clarity, creativity, freedom, peace and joy!  Wouldn’t you want to be living from such a mind rather than one that is clouded and disturbed by innumerable, habitual, enslaving thoughts, feelings, beliefs etc?

But there is more!

As you practise observing your breath in a gentle, compassionate and non-judgmental way, you are setting your mind free from its ingrained habits of judging, responding harshly to undesirable situations or avoiding them altogether!  Can you imagine the freedom and joy that this kind of non-judging, compassionnate attitude affords us?

And there is still more!

Your experience in observing your breath is a microcosm of your experience of the world at large!  Everything that happens during your practice reflects what happens outside your practice.

If you find yourself getting tense or agitated and wanting to stop the practice or if you keep judging your breath, wanting to change it instead of simply observing and accepting it, or if you become impatient with the practice, resisting it or resenting it, you can be certain that you are also displaying similar attitudes, responses and ways of thinking and feeling in life more generally.

In an indirect way, observing your breathing is the perfect way of observing your mind at work!  Such observation provides you with hard data about yourself, your conditioned self, and armed with such data, you are in a position to make new and different choices, freely from your clear mind state!  What a truly powerful thing that is!

So, don’t mistake the finger pointing at the moon (observing the breath) for the moon (self-awareness, freedom from conditioned existence).  It is a means to an end – a simple, easy-to-use means to a profound and liberating end!

Blessings

Lucy Lopez

Awakening to Happiness!

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